


"so, whats wrong with dicks?"

by c_ssius



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Homophobia, Homophobic Language, How Do I Tag, M/M, Mild Language, POV Second Person, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-02 22:31:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14554926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/c_ssius/pseuds/c_ssius
Summary: Nico was hot as hell, being laughed at by his basically only friend, and probably had ink poisoning, and none of this would have been a problem if it weren't for his stupid soulmate.[soulmate au cuz im a slut for those whoops][the homophobia thing is like, really mild i promise dont worry]





	"so, whats wrong with dicks?"

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first work on ao3, yes i do take constructive criticism please  
> i just realized its a bit ooc and rushed im sorry bout that friends  
> but please enjoy thank u

You see it again. A lick of writing on your arm. Sure, there always seems to be ink on your arm but today was just crazy.

It was an amazingly normal day, to which you had woken up with no nightmares and feeling, for once in your life, well slept. But of course, your soulmate had to go and ruin it. You had to wear a sweater today to make sure the black pen was hidden.

It seems that your soulmate was a bit of a dork. They just wouldn't stop drawing diagrams of weird machines, pick up lines, shitty portraits of people from popular shows, the whole nine yards, on their arms.

Today seemed to be one of those days that they were feeling creative, as in almost every spot of your arms and hands were covered in measurements and blueprints of some sort of contraption.

You weren't sure what exactly it was, but "Festus" was mentioned a lot in the descriptions and material lists. You've figured out by now that your soulmate was an engineer, or at least, aspiring to be one.

You head to campus, walking in the heat of spring. Thank the gods (that you [mostly] don't believe in) that summer was close. 

You were sweating by the time you had arrived, and thought twice about taking off the sweater you were wearing. Was it worth it? Probably not. Most people's soulmates weren't total weirdos who couldn't stop messing with their body. 

Wait. That didn't come out right.

Shaking your head to get your mind out of the gutter, you don't notice someone waving at you from a few feet away until they yell your name.

"Nico! Nico, hey Nico!" You curse under your breath when you notice the tall guy by the name of Percy trying to get your attention.

It worked.

"What do you want from me?" you say with a scowl on your face as you walk over there. 

He gestures to his neck with a confused glance, "What's that?"

You raise a brow and take your phone out of your pocket to check what he's talking about.

When you see it, you honestly can't believe it. But there it is. In broad fucking day light. Who does this kid think they are? 

"Perce, can I borrow a pen?" you ask the green-eyed boy as he stifles a laugh. He hands you a pen. [It's the same one he always uses. He never leaves it anywhere.]

You quickly pull up your sleave and write a quick note to your "soulmate". 

"Can you not draw dicks all over your neck, thanks shitstain. -A very very angry s/m"

When you hand the pen back to Percy, you cant help but scowl even more. He's not even trying to not laugh. Honestly! He doubles over and lets loose a couple of snorts and loud laughs. Your heart skips a beat for a second, before going back to normal.

Fuck off, heart. You can go die in a hole.

While scolding yourself, it seems that you've gotten a reply. 

"whats wrong with dicks?" is writting in scrawled handwriting in the crook of your elbow.

The fuck. Is this. Your short temper is already rising. Before you can write back to the dick-drawing soulmate, the bell rings, signalling time to get to first class. Hopefully today goes on with no unexpected surprises.

Who were you kidding? Life doesn't work that way.

\- 

3rd period. Your favorite so far [even though you don't particularly like any classes] would always be History. You only liked it for the Greek mythology courses. They fascinated you.

Well, they did until your soulmate had to ruin your time and start writing on their arm again. Stupid shitty soulmate.

"so anyway back to our convo dicks are okay"

This shit was getting ridiculous. 

"but i mean, if you dont swing that way thatd make sense but come on doesnt everyone love a lil bit o' dick"

You were ready for death. You could basically smell it approaching. Do you dare reply to Sir Dick?

Yes. Yes you do.

"What do you mean, swing that way? Also could you, you know, not talk about dicks anymore? I'm in class and if someone sees this they'll freak the fuck out."

Taking a quick peak around the room, you notice that everyone was paying attention to the front. Probably because your class was watching a movie today. Yaay. Kinda. No, not really. Movies kinda sucked to you, and you're not sure why? They've always seemed boring. You were old fashioned, anyway.

You were knocked out of your reverie after noticing the new words being scribbled on your arm. This person has some terrible penmanship, if you do say so yourself. 

How do they even know what they're writing? You can't even tell most of the time.

"well if i were to guess id say you are a male and y'know,,, dicks n shit. sexualities. this is hard to explain on hand can we just date already"

You blush. Only a little bit. It's probably from the room temperature. Definitely not from the guy.

"Soulmates don't have to date you know. And honestly, i'd rather meet you first even if you were dateable [which you are most definitely not Mr. dick-mechanic]"

You pause and wait for him to reply, but he doesn't. You guess he got busy or gave up, so you focus on the video.

It looks like today was about Hephaestus and Hades. They usually did 2 gods a day, and since it was still pretty early in the course, they hadn't passed going over the 12 major ones yet.

Hades intrigued you to no end. When you read about him you couldn't help but imagine actually knowing him. Who knows? Not like they're real anyway. Just myths.

Suddenly, California Girls by Katy Perry started playing in the front of the classroom.

....The fuck?

"Uh, sorry about that lemme just--" all of a sudden Snoop Dogg started singing. Is- is this for real? You recognize the voice and realize it's Piper, one of the cooler girls.

The classroom bursts into laughs until Piper finally gets it to stop.

"Is something wrong, Ms. McLean?" Mr. Brunner, the teacher, asks. You can hear a bit of amusement in his voice. "Um, no, not really. Pretty sure that was just- just this one kid. Why the fuck would he- can I step out for a second?" 

Piper doesn't even wait before stepping out, even though it wouldn't have mattered anyway. Mr. Brunner always says yes. Shes just got that talent.

"Okay, well since there is only about 5 minutes left in class would anyone like to ask a few questions?" He asks. 

One kid in the 3rd row raises his hand, "Yeah, so what's up with Hades stealing Persephone?" 

You feel a rush of anger. You don't know why, but you go ahead and answer for Mr. Brunner. "Travis, that question is stupid. He loved her. He was obviously lonely and wanted someone to talk to other than the ghosts and skeletons."

Everyone stares at you for a second and you lean down in your chair. Well shit. So much for keeping a low profile. Please go away, as i'd like to drown in misery. Thanks.

"Not how I would put it, but basically, yes. He didn't really steal her, either. She found the entrance to the underworld. There are many variations of these myths. You may believe whatever variation you would like. That said, sometimes things aren't what-" The bell cuts off Mr. Brunner. Everyone rushes out as his short speech gets quieter with every step out the door.

You gather your stuff and head out the door, too. Just one more period until lunch. 

-

You grab an apple from the fruits basket at the edge of the cafeteria. You'd eat something else, but all they had today was pomegranates. You hate pomegranates.

You would sit with Percy if you could, of course, but he's a whole 4 years ahead of you so, of course, you can't. You settle for the small table at the right of the cafeteria where no one has occupied. 

As you start to munch on your lunch, you realize something is appearing on your arm. You almost drop the apple in surprise. 

You forgot your bag so you end up snatching a pen from the kitchen ladies station for taking money.

"sorry about disappearing on you all of a sudden! i had to write a formula in front of the class and forgot about you!"

Should you feel hurt by this? No. Do you? Absolutely not. The apple must be rotten.

You write back, "It's fine, I dont even remember what we were talking about." 

You do remember, though, should you care? 

"oh well thats fine it was stupid anyway- so i take it your in high school? what year?"

How? The fuck? Did this kid know so much about him already? 

"I'm not gonna inadvertantly tell you my age." You write back simply. 

"oh well, i tried! ill get you some day ;)" 

Ugh. You cross out that comment and get up to throw away your apple. 

And, with your amazing luck, someone trips you. 

"Hey there, faggot," you grit your teeth. Will they ever get over that? "Fuck any boys lately?"

Another guy chimes in, "They must have just humored you because you're so pitiful."

You look up at the bullies from the ground. It's all quiet, and you slowly get up.   
"Oh what, do you think that you can fight me? You? Come at me, fa-"

"Hey! back up!" It's that girl again, Piper. Her voice makes you snap out of it, so you quickly turn around and dash out of the cafeteria. 

\- 

You suppose the library wasn't the worst place to end up. Reading wasn't something that particularly entertained you but you do like to read in your spare time. 

You've been dealing with guys like those since 7th grade, when you came out. You think you knew before that, but internalized homophobia kind of got in the way? But you met your first boyfriend and he helped you through it and helped you get over that.

You guys didn't work out though, but that's okay. You decided that you'd find another sun in your life.

Anyway, back to the present. You head to the back of the library and look for a book in the mythology section. Might as well get ahead of the game while you can. 

-

So, you skipped four periods. Whoops. It was worth it though! You're sure you'll ace the test next week. 

Just as you're about to head out, someone bumps into your chair. It swivels around a few times before resting on the guy who'd disrupted your reading.

You cross your legs and raise an eyebrow at the guy. He was an impish-looking shorty. His face reminded you of an elf off of a tv show and the rest of him screamed mischievous. 

He had a tool belt on his waist, wore suspenders, and had that 'I'm up to something' stance. He was grinning sheepishly.

"Wow, I was gonna apologize but you look like you'll beat me up either way, so if you don't mind me, i'm just gonna abscond." He started shuffling away.

For some reason, you don't want him to leave. "Um, no, it's fine." You untangle your legs from each other and held out your hangs to show him you meant no harm.

Then again, he did knock into your chair. But being mad for that is silly. "I only thought you were gonna like, I dunno, report me to the librarians."

The guy chuckles for a second and almost whispers, "W-what? Why would i do that?" 

You let out a sigh, "I dunno, because I kinda just skipped half the day in here? And no one has noticed yet?"

The side of his mouth quirks up. Oh. Oh damn.

"Uh, man I dont know if you noticed this, but you kinda just told me that you skipped school. And I should probably go tell the librarian."

Your eyes widen quickly, and the Imp lets out a laugh. "Oh, i'm kidding man, i'm not gonna tell on you. That would be pretty hypocritical of me, anyway."

You raise an eyebrow at him again as he sits in a chair opposite of you, lazily. He closes his eyes for a second and lets loose a sigh before looking at you again. You notice bags under his eyes.

"Oh! Oh yeah, i've been in here all day. I mean, except for science but other than that, yeah. I've been working on something for a while now. Wanna see?" He giddily gets back up, full of energy again.

Before you can protest, he's taking your hand and maneuvering around the library to a part you haven't been to yet. It looks deserted, and is all the way in the corner, behind a few bookcases that close it into a tiny box.

"You see, I found this area a few months ago and noticed that like, no one comes here! So I decided to make it mine." He takes you through a tiny slit between a bookcase and the wall, which leads into a small room. 

There's a table in the middle of the room that looks like a conference room table, and is full of pages and books. A lot of them look like blueprints. 

You look around the room and let loose a low whistle. On the bookcases, he has stapled large pages of paper with whole designs of some kind of construction to the shelves.

You take a step closer to one of them. "Is- is that? What is this?" You demand from the Elf.

He jumps before grinning in triumph. "Well, it's my design! It's a metal dragon that i've been working on for a long time. His name is Festus."

His voice softens to a whisper when he says that last part. You shake your head a little bit before letting out a laugh, "Well damn."

He looks at you weirdly, and you raise your sleeve in response. He jumps back frantically and calls out a whoop. "That's- that's my arm! Those are my drawings! What the hell!?" 

You look at him for a second before it clicks. He looks down for a second and starts fiddling with a piece of metal he pulled from his belt. Where did he get that from?

"Umm, so. You're my.. Soulmate?" He looks back up at you, confused. 

Umm, duh? Is this guy stupid? "I suppose so." He looks at me for a second before breaking into a grin. "So what IS wrong with dicks?" 

You punch him in the arm. "Shut up, Leonidas." He looks at you in alarm. "How'd you know my name?"

You point to a paper on the ground near his feet. "A science paper that is, sorry to say, all wrong. That'd an F for you, Valdez." You chuckle.

"Oh, hush you." He laughs, too.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading my doods
> 
> this is like my fav rare pair[??] from pjo sooo
> 
> i wrote this back in november?? yikes but i hope you enjoyed plz do leave a comment and kudos to help a cringy kid out


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